Food, Folklore and Fairy Tales: Creating a System(a)

Recently, I delved into a bevy of delight when Andrey Karimov and I began exchanging folklore tales via videos and images . Mostly, I found alot of translated Cossack imagery and tales that were from an antiquated book, and I was checking with him to see if he had heard of them.I am very fond of the art of alot of the stories.

But also, much to my surprise, alot of the tales very much mirrored what I grew up hearing in my own Mexican American culture...
Now , I could on and on and do a side by side analysis of the similarities and imagery, but that would be a whole nother blog...

But for now, one of the key things that I have noticed is that for the most part, the traditional tone of both cultures easily merges. As Mr. Karimov and I share You Tube videos of each other's respective cultures , whether it's song, dance,or performance, we almost always are amazed at how closely related the details are.
At one point, I asked if we had been separated at birth( he didn't respond). While Mr. Karimov takes the time to preserve his heritage, I am off and on trying to dig into mine. Having ADD makes it no easy task and I often get swept away into hours of reading something I never thought I would.
While he knows songs and folklore of his rich Cossack heritage, I can only name a few of the Mexican Folktales I remember from childhood. In fact, one of my favorite folklores , I have tattooed on my back simply because, I have no other real connection of my ancestory and it was one of my favorite tales that my grandfather told me repeatedly , when we spent time together.
This is why meeting Mr. Karimov became more than finding out about Systema. It became a virtual life shift, from the mundane, to now daily reading and studying as much as I can about both worlds. It is a huge undertaking and more than a full time job. How Mr. Karimov does this, is beyond me. I barely remember which was the last book I read a week ago, let alone...which video correlates to what topic we're talking about.
This leads me to believe that Andrey Karimov is a type of phenomenon that we rarely see in our lives. While we like to believe we all meet people for a reason...meeting Mr. Karimov at this specific time in my life , I would have to say, has been the most refreshing thing that has happened in a while. I endlessly get lost in his catalogs of videos of song, dance and music, yet his one to two word responses to my lengthy questions always delight me.
This, to me..is Systema. And while we rarely talk about actual Russian Martial Arts anymore in the "Systema" context, I am always referred back to the meaning of the word..."system". This is a system or method that we should all adapt to. Caring about each other, making connections, forming communities and reaching out to people. Nevermind the awesome training and sword work that visually speaks for itself, but through this type of friendship, we have created something more...a SYSTEM.
The closest thing I've witnessed to something similar to this in my own Hispanic culture was something that happened a few years ago when my son started public school.
I remember desperately trying to rally up members for his low performing school's PTA. I was appointed Vice President(I don't even think I ran for election) and there was a mom, Gloria, who was very active among the Hispanic population of the school(which was 65% Hispanic). Once she realized that I spoke Spanish, her and I became a force and a voice for the Hispanic families that had children in this school. I knew my son was not going to attend there the following year, so I did everything I could to prep her for becoming the school's PTA president. We poured over documents, English lessons, meeting notes(there weren't many) and anything I could think of. Together, we managed to develop two literacy programs for the school and one ESL program so parents can help tutor and learn with their kids.It was exhausting to say the least. Gloria and I rarely spoke outside of school, but one day she called me. I immediately thought something was wrong...(no one calls me, really, unless something is wrong). She asked me what I was bringing to the teacher luncheon the following day.
Because she found out I was a chef, she wanted to see if I was bringing anything spectacular..I told her I was just bringing dip...but it was really good. She laughed and asked if I wanted her to make anything from my childhood.
Now if you're Hispanic, you know this means..tamales. Part of our culture is widely based on food. So without even saying it..she told me she had already made some and was going to save extra for me.
The next day at the luncheon, Gloria and I met in the hallway..she had me follow her to the room where the food was going to be served. When I walked into the room , I all but dropped my pathetic dip with bread bowl, I had spent a total of 15 minutes making. There, in all it's glory, was a buffet fit for several kings. There were about thirteen other hispanic women and Gloria, still working on food preparations. One of the women took my dip from my hands and handed me a plate. The look on my face must have said it all...because she then grabbed my arm and walked me to the first section of food. I was in complete , utter , food anthropology heaven. Some of these women were from El Salvador and South America. Most are from Mexico and none, not one, understood why I was about to cry.
All I remember doing was hugging each of them and getting really, really emotional. While they laughed emphatically, I remember the look on Gloria's face.... she winked at me and in that instant, I knew we had formed a small community. And despite my food geekiness, the women filled my plate with way more food than I could ever imagine. A week or so later, Gloria invited me to her son's birthday party. I asked her if she needed any help and all she said was "don't pass out when you see the food"(in Spanish). When I arrived at the park, there was more food in so many pots and containers than I could ever imagine. I immediately told her she needed to open a restaurant and started calling everyone I knew who had some information on how to help her. She looked at me like I was crazy...but then said" if I open a restaurant, how would I be at the school all the time?"
This was a dilemma. I told her to think about it and to invite me to every gathering she ever had for the rest of my life. And she did, until she moved.
But also, she became PTA president the very next school year. She held meetings in Spanish with an English translator, and did very well for the school. This, was a System.It was a community and probably the closest thing to forming a sustainable source effectively as possible. And it wasn't just one person, it was a few of us...but we did it.
When I look into Mr. Karimov's world, I notice that everyone magically works together. There aren't too many days that go by that I don't communicate with him, and there are even a few days here and there that I talk to some of his instructors from other countries. And seemingly, we are all on the same page. It is such a great feeling to know that this exists, albeit a zillion miles away. It makes you really wonder why this doesn't exist here in the US? Is this an issue as a whole for martial arts? Since I do not know that many martial artists, it would be hard for me to check. I do know that my son's former martial arts instructor and I still talk frequently and I do know, that if she ever needed anything, I would be there for her and vice versa. But maybe, that is only because we clicked. I also know that if any of the people I have trained with , needed something and called me, I'd be there for them too. How could I not? We have all been through some pretty weird things together, and sweated on each other, saw some blood, some emotions...some life. It would be a great System if it stayed that way.

As I was typing this, I decided to watch "Tyson" a documentary about Mike Tyson. His former beloved coach and mentor, Cus D'Amato said this "I never teach until I’ve spoken to the fighter. I have to first determine his emotional state, get his background, to find out what I have to do, how many layers I have to keep peeling off so that I get to the core of the person so that he can recognize, as well as I, what is there."
I almost fell off my chair when I heard this. This is what ,Mr. Karimov and I had been talking about . This is not a new concept, but clearly , produces world championship results. Unfortunately, Mike Tyson fell apart once Mr. D'Amato passed away, but swears that his life would have been much worse had he not had the few impermeable years he had , with him.Imagine, if he had remained alive, the completely healthy mental shape Mike Tyson would have been in? Andrey and I have spent hours upon hours talking about the psychology of Systema. Something I never really thought much about until I asked him.And when I now say "he's my instructor" people must think , "she is crazy, he's in Russia!!"Let me be very clear. I know that. He knows that. But I have learned so much from him about the mindset of training, that I am baffled that it is not discussed here. What he has taught me, is far better from any fall or punch I have conditioned my body to take. Sure , maybe mindset and mental state are mentioned in a few books, but the sense of understanding what real Systema is, now, more than ever...has stopped me dead in my tracks.In a good way.
Now, for the life of me, I don't understand why Andrey Karimov spends so much time interacting with me, but I am truly grateful, to him and his beautiful family. It has made such a huge impact on my personal training goals and direction I would like to take and definitely has opened my eyes to a world of possibilities not only for myself, but for my family , friends and community. How can one person make such a difference? Just by being open and talking. In fact, sometimes, I watch his training videos and think, "this was the man that I just talked to about Russian Folktales?".Because, he is so very , very powerful at training, and so very enjoyable to talk to, you'd almost swear it is two different people...but that is because I had such preconceived notions of what an "instructor" and "instruction" is.I have even , in fact, asked him if it was him in all the videos and still the same person I talk to. Can a person have such a dynamic of being both a great artist and compassionate human being? Yup. And he wants everyone to feel the same. It's a System. Defined in the rawest, purest , state.
And on the heals of all this, I remembered  a picture someone sent me this morning, that made my mouth drool...

And yes, I am aware it is a religious setting, and yes, maybe I shouldn't have noticed the food first. But more importantly , I noticed just simple sense of community. Whether it be a church setting, ladies luncheon, or martial arts group meal....this is still Systema. 

click here to watch one of my favorite Systema videos of all time

Fear Mongering: How You Can Learn About Fear, For Free!!

Ever since I began my training in Systema, probably the one thing I heard over and over was the word "fear".
Now, just hearing that word, may make people start to slightly panic.That's right, if you tell people, "today, we are going to work on FEAR control", then you may get some reaction.
When someone says that to me, I immediately think of clowns.Clowns scare me. They are a legitimate fear.

Just found out this is Tim Curry, so that makes it ok.

But, in training, fear control is taught in different ways. Everyone is kinda more or less told that to control fear , they have to evolve and work through their own thresholds. Now this, as someone who has had several close calls with death, sounded completely foreign to me. How can anyone teach people how to control fear, if we all have different fear levels? How is this possible? How do you even know what my fear is, if you have just met me?
Well the answer is, it isn't fear control. It's panic control.But because that's more or less a subjective word, it is replaced with "fear". Why? Because the word "fear"sells. Quickly.If I tell you, "here, I will give you all the tools you need to defend yourself from getting attacked and to stop being scared", you may believe it. You will really believe it if you go to a seminar and watch others believe it.
But, if you've been in a close call, or near death incident, you may check your psyche.For me , personally, my fearful moments were not getting mugged, or jumped, or assaulted. My moments were: being in a burning house, hearing my son was in a horrible car accident, having a nurse tell me that I had a miscarriage.
That, is fear. Those precise moments. Also, alot of panic. But mostly, fear.There is no way, on earth, you can teach me to prepare for those moments. Why ? Because for the most part, I had no idea any of these things would happen to me . Those incidents happen so quickly, that your mind sometimes doesn't react right away(this is perhaps why PTSD sets in).
In training, in a classroom type environment(indoor or outdoor), it was impossible for me to experience even the same level of fear as any of my real life experiences. Class had a start and stop time and I felt completely comfortable getting thrown around, hit , kicked, stepped on. I did not ever experience fear. Nor would I want to.
However, across the board, the basic training for this fear control(fear of what, I'm not sure) , was breath holds. Breath holds, if you read about it in any Systema blog,book or see in a class, consist of burst breathing, breath holding, breath releasing etcetc, until you almost or in fact, do pass out. If you've ever played the "pass out game"(which many children every year die from), it is the same feeling. I've done this breath work and the results were horrible, not scary. I threw up in my own mouth once, I blacked out another time, and the last and final time I did it, I had the worst migraine I've ever had in my life. Was I scared? No.
Mad? Yes.Very. Why was I doing this? I knew what my fears were and there was no way this breaking psyche point of breath holding was going to get me there. Apparently, you are supposed to feel a sense of panic and be able to control yourself when you get to that point. The point when you should be gasping for air, you're supposed to hold out a little longer.
Um.Newsflash. I, like many people...suffer from asthma. Telling me "you know..stop breathing so you start panicking" is like telling King James how to write the Bible.
I KNOW how this feels. Again..even suffocating during an asthma attack, not the same fear as being mugged , in a fire, or hearing really bad news. Not even close.

actual picture from that day

Why? Because I have had asthma almost my whole life. I am a pro at asthma. I have the kind that no one wants. The kind that can be dormant for a year then provide me with another year of complete confusion and an array of medications.In fact, I am so calm, cool and collected during my almost choke-to-death asthma sessions, that even my own Doctor was concerned during a visit once when I arrived in her office and I was gasping for air. I was there for something completely unrelated to asthma and a certain airborne scent triggered me. By the time her nurse was checking my lungs, I was in full blown attack. My son sat and read his book and I calmly looked for my inhaler, while the doctor and nurse ran from room to room searching for a nebulizer. This is now what I feel is a result of lifelong exposure to the chaos that surrounds this disease. My calm demeanor during the attack is a result of years long panic and frantic not knowing what to do. Immersion therapy at it's finest. Because I was in a total environment with this disorder, I knew how to calmly and confidently handle the situation.
So how or what makes anyone who starts out in Systema think they can confidently handle a surprise attack? How can you train for fear, if you are not in a total "fear" environment? How do you even define your own fear levels , if you have not ever been in the situation of being attacked, randomly, unprovoked, and without warning.You know how you can do this?
Enlist.
That's right..sign up for any one of the armed forces and train. Train like you mean it. Train like you are fighting for something or someone . There are no Systema competitions, (other than the "my ego is better than your ego" ones, or "my gym has more participants than yours"), so why do any of us think we are training for a total fear environment? Because we bought into the marketing.
As I began writing this a few days ago, something really disturbing hit the news wire. A woman was beheaded in Oklahoma, by a coworker. While the level of " I told you so's" hit the internet, I sat and waited to see which martial artist was ready to capitalize on this. How did I know this would happen? Patterned behavior.
Within 24 hours a notable school here mentioned how their women's class switched to "anti-beheading measures"
Ummmmmm, what? How do you even begin to teach a class on that? Do they teach this class in countries that have frequent beheadings?  I don't know what was actually discussed in class, but a first thought would be teaching situational awareness, BUT , if you are already training in any martial arts , you should already have been taught that....I would think.
Unless, you need to be SOLD that you NEED to be taught how to protect yourself from a beheading. Other than donating all the class proceeds to the victim's family, I cannot imagine how this is possible. Unless class consisted of praying for the victim and witnesses, then I am completely , once again, face planting into my keyboard. Then, openly discussing that , this was your class topic...wha??
While I wish Systema here would stop targeting vulnerable individuals,and fear mongering groups of people,  I see the financial gain from it. Once I stepped back from the US Systema methods  and looked at international options, I realized..this is an American problem. The marketing for most classes usually consists of " protect yourself" or " know yourself" or " learn combat style", or even better, "advanced weapons training". And you know what I found? Some of the best, finest, most well rounded Systema groups and instructors, don't even advertise or have classes, AND..they will talk to you..for freeeeeeeee!
 I wish we would all question "what are we really training for?"
Are we all weekend warriors ? Are any of us really prepared for real live fear?
Everyone knows, being in battle, of any kind..is REAL fear training. A mom who's son just got diagnosed with leukemia...fear.
A mom, who sees her child's teacher on TV arrested for molestation. Fear.
A mom, who can't find her kid in a grocery store.Fear.
A dad, who's daughter goes missing after he tells her to break up with a certain male. Fear.
Seeing no movement on an ultrasound , after being pregnant for five months....fear.
Signing up for war......
These are all examples of real fear. Telling me that holding my breath until I vomit, or holding me down while six people are rolling over me..not fear. Not even close. Maybe , panic at best..but even then, class is only a few hours..so I know, it will be done.
If you have trained for Systema for more than three years, you could have easily joined the military. Not only would you receive FREE combat training, FREE uniforms and FREE travel, you would receive real live FEAR training. For free...in fact, this country will pay YOU(at some point, if you make it out alive).I dare any of us to approach any vet that just came back from a war and brag to them about how many Systema seminars we've been to, or who's school we just got back training from , or which instructor punched us while we sheepishly waited in line. Please..do tell a vet about your highly paid for combatives training, show them the shirt you paid for.See what happens.

As for myself, I will continue to face my daily fears of not knowing if I will ever recover from a spinal injection, or if I will ever heal from a tragic loss, or if I can financially maintain my household long enough for my body to get back into working order.This is fear.

Study the definitions alone, challenge yourself, your instructor, your life.

Fear is a vital response to physical and emotional danger—if we didn't feel it, we couldn't protect ourselves from legitimate threats. But often we fear situations that are far from life-or-death, and thus hang back for no good reason. Traumas or bad experiences can trigger a fear response within us that is hard to quell. 

Panic  suddenly destroying the self-control and impelling to some frantic action.

Bamboozled to deceive or get the better of (someone) by trickery, flattery, or the like; hoodwinked (often followed by into)

Learn about :
Psychological marketing .